Love of my Life

Love of my Life

Heart Mother

One day my world came crashing down,I'll never be the same.They told me that my child was sick.I thought, "am I to blame"?I don't think I can handle this.I am really not that strong.It seemed my heart was breaking.I have loved him for so long.I will not give up on this child.I will listen to your advice.I will give my child any chance.No matter what the price.I will learn all that I need to help my child thrive.I'll even use that feeding tube.My child must survive!Will he need a lot of therapy?Will he gain the needed weight?Please God, help me do this.I will accept our fate.When the monitors beep at night, it serves as my reminder.How many parents would love that sound.Tomorrow I will be kinder.As another Angel earns his wings,I run to my child's bed.I watch him sleep for quite a while.I bend down and kiss his head.I cry for the parents whose hearts have been broken.I look to You wondering why?Oh Lord, I just can't know your matter how I try.And yet, I trust you hold his life, and guide us through each day.My mind says savor each moment he's here,but my heart begs, "PLEASE let him stay"!From pacing the surgical waiting room, to sitting by his bed.From wishing for a good nights sleep, to learning every med.From wondering, "will he be alright?", to watching him reach out his hands.With every smile my heart just melts, despite life's harsh demands.For all who see that faded line.I look to them and smile.You see my child is loved so much.I would face ANY trial.That scar I trace with my finger (It's the door to his beautiful heart).God must have known how much I'd love him (Just as He loved him from the start).A heart mom is always a heart mom.Now wise beyond her years.For those who have angels in heaven,Our hearts share in all of your tears.Every day I will try and remember,I was chosen for him (and no other).I will always embrace that beautiful day.......When I became a "Heart Mother"

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Whirlwind of a life

So today marks two weeks since his surgery and one week home it's no surprise my little whirlwind has kept me so busy I haven't had the time to write down all that has gone on!!!

 At the hospital it was so different then The last surgery he had some down time when he would sleep not this time once they pulled his chest tubes he was off and running down the halls from sun up to sun down and sometimes in the middle of the night !!!

 I didn't have a chance to do much but run with his oxygen tank behind him as he ran his marathon in primary children's Have I said what a amazing boy he is two days after surgery he was out of the CICU on to the recovery floor and day three chest tubes out ten minute later running not walking down the halls

 Day 7 we were on our way home with 4 Meds and oxygen which I foundly call Fred

 since Fred hangs on me all day while my whirlwind runs around the house

 We have been busy tryin to keep Connor untangled from His oxygen cord and getting my baby girls birthday ready which is today

 she is 4 can you believe that and we built her a dream playhouse and my aching body is here to pay for it
two days of painting and building and buying this little project turned into a huge one

 Connor is doing good only a few bad nights which are sad he says awie and holds his chest makes my heart break for him

 Wednesday is check up day to make sure the fluid is gone and maybe to loose Fred the tank

 Pray for a good appointment and rest for me I am so so worn out

 I want to thank my family and my mom and dad for their love and care while we were in the hospital there wasn't a day my mom didn't come to see me

 she drove down everyday to be with us I love you mom more then words can say !!!

No comments: